Jealousy - As Cruel As The Grave

"Son, jealousy is a cruel as the grave."  A friend of mine told me that he heard his father say that many times when he was growing up.  He did not realize his father was actually quoting a scripture in the Bible until later in life when he became a minister.  

For love is strong as death, jealousy is as cruel as the grave; coals thereof are coals of fire; which hath a most vehement flame. (Song of Solomen 8:6)

Like my friend's father, I experienced the cruel grip of jealousy in my own life:
 
I remember exactly where I was standing the day my pastor asked me if I would consider being a secretary for the church. It was such an honor to be asked......I also remember the day it ended.

I walked into the church office to put away the offering on a Sunday morning and someone else was sitting at my desk, unfolding the dollar bills from the offering plates. I still recall the sadness, anger and despair that consumed me, for it meant only one thing.... I had been replaced.

There were other changes being made that I was not aware of.  After years of service, I felt left out.

I could not get past the hurt. It consumed me until I became jealous and bitter.  

Being bitter is like drinking poison hoping the other person would die. All the while you are slowly killing yourself on the inside.


Jealousy can cause more damage to a relationship than any thing I have ever experienced.  I began spending less time in prayer and more time talking to others. That is when we get into trouble with God.

 Hurting people hurt people.

Have you ever seen a dog that has been hurt? Even the most gentle of dogs will growl and even try to bite it's owner if he tries to touch the injured area. I was injured so deeply that the slightest reference to it caused pain. Instead of allowing God to heal me, I developed such a rotten attitude that all of heaven could smell the stench. All the hurt, disappointment and bitterness that I had inside came surfacing to the top, like a pot boiling over on a stovetop. I found fault in everything at the church, poisonous venom spewing out of my mouth.

I realized how low I had sunk when I blabbed to my new friend a piece of gossip I had heard about someone else. I knew in my spirit that I was somehow crossing a line.  But I was driven by the jealousy and bitterness that had taken hold of me.

Jealousy is the fear of losing something that you believe to be already be yours.

Jealousy and envy will make your life hell on Earth. Jealousy hurts people around us, especially those we say we love the most. During this time, I was unkind to some of the sweetest, kindest people I know, just because I was jealous of them. I thought they were getting something I deserved.  The Devil is "the ACCUSER of the BRETHREN" (Revelation 12:10), and when you're in a jealous spirit, the Devil whispers his lies against others in your ears and plays upon your selfishness and fears.



It isn't easy to slay a monster. 

I had to pray desperately and to ask the Lord to deliver me from this negative, fearful spirit. I finally had to confess it to two of my closest friends and asked them to help me pray about it and to rebuke me when any signs started showing in my attitude.  Then I was able to ask one of the individuals I had so badly offended to forgive me. In doing so, an even stronger relationship was formed.

Speaking about it helped me own up to it, address it and caused me to be more able to identify it when it tried to come back. "Confess your faults to one another, and pray for one another. RESIST the Devil (resist his thoughts) and he will FLEE from you!"--James 5:16; 4:7.

The time to attack this monster is when it first rears its ugly head. Now, when I see the first sign of jealousy rising up, I will not give in to it.  I will force my thoughts to think about something else, not dwell on the thing that is causing the jealousy and pray for God to replace that void in my heart that the enemy is trying to fill will His love.

Genuine love, mercy, forgiveness, openness and understanding have salvaged many a relationship that would have otherwise been destroyed by jealousy and pride.

Jealousy really boils down to selfishness, pride and possessiveness.

 When jealousy is removed, your life will become full of peace instead of pieces.  Where God's love dwells, there is no room for jealousy.

There are many times I come back and read this post.  Fighting jealousy is a constant battle.  But it is a war that I intend to win.